Leading Amidst Challenge

It’s no surprise to anyone that our world has changed. Notably, the way we conduct business and communicate. COVID-19 has undeniably adjusted how companies govern and the virus has been a source of stress for families – from unemployment to a fear of falling ill, emotions have stirred over these past four months.

As many companies looked to cut costs, headcount reduction was sizable. What’s more, teams were stretched thin regardless of an unchanged workload. When considering how to lead through a challenge, it is more amply clear than in previous taxing situations, how stress and limited resources can affect leadership. In observing team and management behavior, here are fundamental reminders for how to lead amidst challenge. 

Mentorship.

If you have a mentor, you know it takes work. Not only from the recipient to be receptive, but from the mentor: to engage, listen, and offer advice. As a leader, we must realize that it is our turn to pay that mentorship forward and actively engage – answering hard questions and offering support in difficult times.                                                                       

Self-Care.

I learned an important lesson during COVID: increased workload decreases the ability to govern effectively. This is why witnessing leaders through crises is a truth serum for their core self. Leaders are fully challenged when resources are scraggly, tensions are high, and economic fear ensues. In order to persevere, to remain constant, and to not spiral out of control, we must practice self-care. Daily meditation, exercise, and actively facing our own shortcomings is the path to ensuring that your team is cared for. Liken this to putting on an oxygen mask in a plane when needed; you cannot help others if you do not have an oxygen supply for yourself.

Recognition + Communication.

When a challenge is staring us in the face, we often focus on the task at hand, pushing personal feelings and emotional baggage aside. This, I argue, will only exacerbate discontentment, fuel hostility, and remove effective communication. The responsibility falls on you to pause, recognize your team for the work they are doing, and not take a back seat to communication. Easier said than done, I get it. But make an active decision, daily, to hear your team and resist the urge to put tasks before relationships, even if your day-to-day workload has increased exponentially.

Need a Differentiator? Master EQ.

If you think about it, what is the common thread throughout all business?  People.

Emotional intelligence is defined in a myriad of ways, but the short and sweet version: it is the ability for a person to be aware of their feelings and others, while also controlling emotions, being thoughtful with responses.

Whether we are communicating with a family member, or a Fortune 100 company, understanding others, acting empathetically, and adjusting for the environment is 

Positivity Meets Reality: The world is not perfect, no. Far from it in fact. Yet, positive people often lift those up around them and approach issues as opportunities. When people are able to take challenges or obstacles and look at them for what they are - challenging but not life-threatening – the positive outlook perseveres.

Stress Management:  How do you manage your stress? Whether someone cuts you off on the highway or smacks you in the face with an umbrella (more common in NYC), that is no reason to let your day unravel. I propose: be aware of your frustration, recognize it for what it is, accept it, and move on. Deep breathing helps (as does some intense exercise!).

Take note: Facial expressions and body language speak loudly. If someone is avoiding eye contact or shifting their weight, is the conversation worth having? Or, is someone beginning to stir with anger? Being aware of others’ behaviors and body language can help circumvent heightened arguments or can save time. Hold the challenging discussion for time all parties can be attentive and thoughtful.

Higher EQ supports team alignment, reduces conflict, lowers stress, and fuels the positivity tank. Unsurprisingly, positive spins result in proactivity and solution-focused perspectives, as opposed to reactivity (its evil twin).

Keep fighting the good fight!

First published on LinkedIn

Today is the Day (to be an awesome boss)

If you have a team, and you are earnest in your desire to be an effective leader, keep fighting the good fight. It is proven that engaged employees (those that have a sense of meaningfulness, feel safe in their place of work, and know their superior is available) put forth discretionary effort which reflects well on you and the team as a whole.

Perhaps you do not have time to read the latest empirically backed study about just what makes a manager successful. But what you do have is a couple minutes to chow down on simple – undoubtedly sound – reminders.

Trust.
Does your behavior increase and support trust? This is a non-negotiable. If you want a transparent team dynamic, where members feel psychologically safe, trust is paramount. Be your word.

Belief.
Do you believe that your people are capable? Make one adjustment to your day that encourages a person (or multiple people) on your team to take ownership of a process or task. Empowering your team is not about micromanaging the process along the way. It’s quite the opposite. It is about watching them thrive on their own and being nearby for assistance when you are needed.

Integrity.
I recently read an article about Warren Buffett’s philosophy on integrity. In brief, if your behavior was published in a newspaper every day, would you be pleased with what you read? Would you be proud that your family and friends receive the same paper? To me, this take-away is powerful. Strive to be the best version of yourself, with integrity as a guiding principle.

Humility.
When you trip over your ego you are on a path to alienate your team and set a reputation that is hard to correct. Knowing that you do not always have the answer - and giving credit to its rightful owner - is a strength, not a weakness. I liken the ability to be humble as the ability to truly listen to what a person is suggesting; are you gathering information effectively? Are you assessing the facts accurately? Humility is the antidote to delusion!

First published on LinkedIn

Full: The Conflict Fuel Tank

As I coach tenured and new managers, one of the many recurring themes I hear about is the rampant interpersonal conflict within organizations. If there is conflict, the organization is not unique; in fact, if business owners believe there is little conflict among their team members, I am comfortable telling them they are wrong. 

Conflict avoidance is something we learn from a young age. Rather than addressing the way we feel, we look to our caregivers to fix the discomfort. While I am not suggesting you leave your young children to fight their battles on the playground without guidance, I do think there is validity in fighting our own battles from a young(ish) age. We were conditioned to have the parent, the sitter, the teacher, and then the boss, help fix our problems. Yes, I am a proponent of assisting employees in sorting through issues, but it is not about “doing it for them.” The enablement concept is closely linked with employee entitlement (and let’s make sure we are not encouraging that). 

The key here: do not avoid the topics that cause tension (employees often want to go around the issues) but instead we need to work through them. 

Avoidance of conflict, which mainly is attributed to our golden conditioning of thinking conflict is terrible, only fills the gas tank. Rather than simple disagreement, conflict is stored and builds upon itself. The person with whom you had a conflict now appears only to be or bring bad news. Typically, this is not the case – but we have filed it in our brain bank as “bad.” 

If you reach this point, it is probable you think addressing conflict is too exhausting and time-consuming. But the truth is: you need to face conflict as it rises. When you do not, it becomes overwhelming. You end up anxious, overly angry, and unsure as to why you despise a person so vehemently. 

If your conflict fuel tank is overflowing, it is time to start addressing (through), not avoiding (around) it. 

This article was first published on LinkedIn.